There’s good news and bad news

I just got a call from my doctor.

The good news is that I don’t have Celiac Disease.  Of course, as she pointed out, that doesn’t mean I can eat wheat without experiencing joint and muscle pain as a result.  We only know that I’m not flattening out the intestinal cilia when I do.  I don’t have to worry about about getting “glutened” by microscopic amounts of gluten.  I can go back to my previously normal level of wheat-free(ness).

Then there’s the bad news.

The rest of my test results (cholesterol, chemistry, etc) are the worst that I’ve seen in years.  All are concerning, one is a little worrisome.  I know they are the result of the 10 week gluten-binge, but…. It’s still depressing.

I want to strike out an punish myself.  I want to go on the strictest diet I can, eating nothing but raw lettuce and tiny amounts of fish and chicken, but I know I can only maintain that for a short time before the deprivation kicks in and leaves me huddled in a pool of misery and chocolate syrup.

So I know that isn’t the answer.  Now you know it too.

The answer is to continue to go where I started when I gave up gluten.  Fresh veggies (still craving that magnesium), protein, wheat-free grains.  I know that I need to pay attention to what I eat when I eat it, otherwise I don’t remember.  I know I need to continue my yoga practice, revive my meditation practice and continue riding my bike for the sheer joy it gives me.  The rest will follow.

But it’s hard remembering that the test results are a snapshot of the previous 10 weeks, and not are not a good view of where I am right now, or yesterday, or the day before that.  They don’t have to negatively inform tomorrow.  Above all else, I need to stick to my truth, that diets don’t work, they only cause deprivation and bingeing and that by living mindfully, I will overcome a decade of living unconsciously.

More later….

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1 comment to There’s good news and bad news

  • Good for you for not punishing yourself in ways you know won’t be helpful. Most important is where you go from here and it sounds like you are going to go in a good direction. Keep your chin up! It will get better! Sending you big hugs!